Hey Loves! To be honest I had to pour a glass of wine to write this one…
Let’s just say break-ups are one of those shitty things that everyone experiences at least once in their life. Then, there are some of us who experience it over…and over…and over like myself, but look at me, I survived and so can you. After a breakup, I cry water falls for a couple of days, and then for a couple weeks I over analyze about what happened and the reasons why it happened. After those several weeks of battling my thoughts, I began to gain my strength back and my sadness turns into anger. When you are used to a person being in your life it’s hard to imagine that person no longer being there. It leaves you feeling vulnerable, stressed, and left with unanswered questions which can drive you crazy. A lot of things become uninteresting to you, and you feel rather dead inside. Trust me, I’ve been there done that. The thought of texting them becomes a laugh, specially when you know for sure the person isn’t going to get right back to you like they used to. Then, inevitably a few days after that, I hear from them. BUT ANYWAY. I’m going to give you the ugly truth, in order to grow you must let it go. (Inhale, Exhale)
With this blog entry I will be sharing the basic steps on how to get through a break up with as much grace, and as few “i miss you” text messages as possible.
Control What You Can Only Control
You are the only one who has control over your actions, reactions, feelings, and thoughts. When two people break up, it’s all about how you handle the situation so you don’t drive yourself crazy. It’s literally a learning experience. I know it’s hard not to go lurking through their Facebook page and seeing what they have been up too, but trust me you don’t want to do that. You’re literally looking for something to make you even more miserable, because he or she is posting something to make sure you see it.. trust me, DON’T DO IT TO YOURSELF. One thing you can do is block them from all social sites. If you both still have one another as a friend, but you both aren’t talking to each other anymore, what’s the purpose. Focus on you and move on with grace. (Inhale, Exhale).
“And she finally gave up, dropped the fake smile as a tear ran down her cheek and she whispered to herself, “I can’t do this anymore.” -Unknown
“Find a place that brings you peace and that’s exactly what I did.” -Von Renee
Whether you’re single or in a relationship, the most important relationship we will have for the rest of our lives is the relationship we have with ourselves. When we have a total understanding of who we are and the respect we have for ourselves, it’s easier to let people know who we are, and what we will and will not put up with.
We will also know what we can bring to a relationship when we know who we are. When relationships end, people are very hard on themselves. Believe it or not, thinking about what could have been done differently over and over is and example of beating yourself up. There is nothing that can be changed from what has already been done, so release the pressure.
Self-care doesn’t have to cost anything. It involves treating yourself with kindness and acceptance, not being overly concerned about the negative emotions, and realizing that this will not last forever and with the will of God, he will see you through. Get back into the things you love doing, or find a new hobby you always wanted to do. My interest was blogging :] The take away from this message is to re-discover who you are in the absence of your ex-partner. Focus on yourself and fill yourself up with things that bring you peace of mind. (Inhale, Exhale)
Philippians 4:13 “I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”
Leave The Rebound Relationships Alone
Rebounding is not such a great idea because all you are trying to do is distract yourself from what you are feeling. Allowing someone to be apart of your life so soon before you can fully heal will only confuse your situation and your emotions. There is nothing wrong with going out for a good time, but keep your feelings out of it. If anyone is approaching you because they would like to pursue something with you, staying true to yourself by simply saying “I am not looking for anything at this moment” is a fair response. They have no choice but to respect that and to keep it pushing. [BOY, BYE!] Being single for a while is not a bad thing at all. OKAY, yes I agree it gets lonely but I’d rather be alone than giving myself to someone I’m not prepared to be with mentally or physically. There is a difference between being lonely and just being alone.
“God made you. You’re beautiful. God died for you. You’re loved. God takes care of you. You’re safe. God is with you. You’re not alone.” -Unknown
Be Fearless & Go For It!
It’s a good time to set goals for yourself. Whether it’s coming up with a way to save more of your earnings, or a career change. Goals will help you look forward to something new and it also fuels your ambition. Goal setting isn’t just about creating a plan for your life and holding yourself accountable, it’s also about giving yourself the inspiration necessary to aim for things you never thought possible. It’s a fresh start to renewing yourself. This is where I am right now with my healing, and I refuse to give up because I have come this far. I’m curious to find out how far I can go with this. I made an agreement with myself that I will never allow another to come in control what is for me.
X’s & O’s